Birth Story of Gabriella Ro and Surviving natural birth without epidural

On 27th December 2016 at about 4+am, my water bag broke in the middle of my sleep. It was a gush of clear fluid (watery and a little slimy) and I made a mess on my bed. I called out to my husband who was sleeping right next to me. Partially still in his dreams, my husband thought I was having my usual leg cramps and was asking me subconsciously which leg was having the cramp. When it dawned on him that my water bag broke, he rushed to the toilet to get a "cloth". In a state of a shock with little time for thought process, he brought a floor mat instead of a towel. :)

We made a phone call to the NUH Delivery Suite and the nurse asked if I felt any contractions. At that point, I didn't. So the nurse told me to head towards the hospital but no need to rush, preferably to arrive within 2 hours. So my husband and I took a bath, put the wet bed sheets in the washing machine for cleaning, waited for the laundry to be done to hang for drying, packed our bag, called for an Uber and headed down to NUH. The Uber driver was very kind and friendly. He told us his wife took 5 hours to deliver when the contractions were 10 mins apart. At that moment, my husband and I were thinking if we should go for breakfast first. But Coffee Bean, Mr Bean were closed and we decided to head up to the delivery suite first and check what is the status. At that time, it was 5+, close to 6am already. The nurse checked the cervix and it was about 4-5 cm wide. They told me estimated time of delivery was 12noon to 2pm. In my mind, I was thinking "Serious? I am going to keep feeling this contraction for another 6 hours?" About 20-30 minutes later, the nurse checked again. Then the cervix had widened to 8-9cm. The nurse started to panic and told me not to push till the doctor arrived. I wasn't really pushing. But I do feel this superb "da bian" feeling and probably my natural response was to push. Thank goodness the Dr Su arrived shortly after.

I made a total of 3 pushes when Dr Su arrived. During the 1st push, I wasn't really sure if I was pushing or pulling back. On one hand, I thought I was pushing but I was holding back as I was afraid that I was pushing poop instead of baby out. During the 2nd push, I pushed so hard that my right leg cramped and I screamed that my leg had a cramp and the nurse was massaging my leg for me, and I missed the cycle. During the last push, I recalled clearly that I breathed the laughing gas deeply and pushed, doing that about 3 times and then I had this great feeling of baby sliding out of me.

Dr Su proceeded to stitch the episiotomy. In my opinion that was more painful than birth as it was continuous for a few minutes, unlike contractions was on short regular times. At that time, I was probably also addicted to the laughing gas and demanded for it even though I was told that I don't need it any more.

2 Key Advises for those who want to take the challenge of not using epidural:

1) Right Pushing Technique:
Only push during the feeling of contraction. Each time you try to push, the hole gets bigger. The contraction period is a natural phenomenon to help you push out.

2) Right Breathing Technique:
Use the laughing gas only when needed. When contraction is coming, ask your husband to place the laughing gas mask to your nose and breathe really hard. Then remove the mask once the contraction is over.

Maybe because I did not use epidural, I recovered really fast and I was up and walking about the suite that evening. The most uncomfortable experience during the 1st 2 days post-delivery is episiotomy stitch and lochia. You just keep bleeding and you have to make sure you don't tear the stitch. I had some difficulty pooping too as my pelvic muscles were weak and I couldn't push hard, afraid that I tear the stitch.

At 38th Week (22-29 Dec)

 

This weekend is the Christmas weekend and it also happens to be my 38th week pregnancy. My hubby got me a pair of cute ice mint coloured Adidas Superstar shoes (S76154) which just arrived from the mail. I am super impressed with the speed of delivery from Korea to Singapore. The size fits me perfectly. (EU 38 = 23.5cm) :) In pastel suede with snakeskin embossing on the 3-Stripes, this is my first pair of superstar shoes. As the name suggests, the feminine and cuteness of the shoes make me feel like a superstar this weekend. :) 

Postpartum Preparation

My EDD is 4 Jan 2017 (End of 39th Week), which means from now till my EDD, I am just 3 weeks away and the countdown is definitely on. Sometimes, I wonder to myself if I am well-prepared enough. In terms of baby stuff, I believe we have bought most of the essentials. In terms of emotional preparation and postpartum to-dos, I don’t think we can ever be ready. I am often asked the question of whether I made enough plans for it. But I believe too much planning is not good either as I will be too fixated in the plan and if there is any unforeseen changes, I may end up even more stressed. However, I do believe some level of mental preparation is important so that irregardless what situation is met, at least I know what the options are.

1) Booking of Jamu Massage Service + Getting Anti-cellulite creams

Heavily encouraged by my sister, I decided to book for the Jamu service even though I was initially not intending to. (SAVE MONEY) I gave in because I think it is good to pamper myself for once since I decided to do without a confinement lady, which is even more costly. The Jamu service also includes breast massage to help ensure there is no breast engorgement which is the usual cause of postpartum depression. Breast engorgement is painful for the mother and the baby will not be able to receive a good flow of milk, leading to hunger. With lots of hunger cries, the mother will become stressed and resulted in less milk production. The vicious cycle continues. The same Jamu lady which my sis is using also recommended me to also use Clarins Body Shaping Cream and Clarins Body Lift Cellulite Cream in conjunction with the tummy massage to increase the efficacy of reducing stretchmarks and toning the tummy. 

In the meantime, I am using Elancyl Stretchmark Cream. I got it cheap at Watsons at 1 for 1. I have also tried Cocoa Butter Stretch Mark Oil which has a nice Rosehip Fragrance. However, I find the oil a little oily for my preference. I use of Elancyl Stretchmark Cream on both my tummy and thighs. Not only does it make my tummy feels tighter, it also reduces the appearance of cellulite on my thighs. It is not a miracle cream but a preventive measure. It works by nourishing cell metabolism and moisturizing the skin to keep it fairly elastic. Applying cream alone will not help, it is also important to consume lots of water along with a nutritious intake of vitamins (A, C and E), healthy protein, and zinc to increase skin's elasticity. Over-consumption of caffeine, on the other hand, reduces elasticity. I am quite particular about stretchmarks as they are really unsightly.


2) Clean out the freezer and fridge, to free up space for fresh food and milk bottles

I have partially cleared the fridge and kitchen cupboard, and found lots of expired sauces and tea bags. It feels great clearing up stuff. This what people describe a pregnant woman's urge to clean and organise as a sign of labour, commonly known as "Nesting". 

3) Maternity Pads & Disposable Panties

It didn't daunt on me that I will have heavy menses-like bleeding or discharge named lochia. My sis warned me that the flow will be so heavy that I would need a good maternity pad. Typical pads may be uncomfortable due to the stitches post-episiotomy. A comfy one will be that from Mothercare.

4) Meals

As my previous blog-post on Postpartum beliefs and practices has stated, I tend to believe in a well-balanced diet. As I am not going to have a confinement lady to help out, I may turn to healthy food subscriptions or delivery services to supply me with the meals. 

• Food Matters : Provides a huge variety of food (Asian, Fusion, Western, Vegetarian, Low Carb, Gluten-free). A monthly subscription ranging $40-$144/month, est $7.20-10/meal. No additional delivery fees an unfinished credits are rolled over to the following month. Only deliver for lunch time at the moment. They have an app for you to plan your meal in advance easily.
• Grain : Provides healthy range of western food (Variety is still limited but you are not "forced" into a monthly subscription as you can order when you need it.) Food ranging from $10-$16/meal. Delivery charges are additional and ranges depending on location (~$6.50) with a minimum order surcharge (if orders are under $25). 
• Kim's Kitchen : Confinement food packages at 28 Days (single at $779, dual at $1,558), 14 Days (single at $389.50, dual at $779; Prices before GST). 
• Natal Essentials : Confinement food packages at 28 Days (single at $818, dual at $1,558), 14 Days (single at $418, dual at $818; Prices before GST)

Postpartum Beliefs and Practices

Postpartum seems to be a period which many parents probably dread. The Chinese named this period the "Confinement Period", which also has a negative connotation. Mothers are confined to staying at home and rest for at least 1 month. Other restrictions also include not washing hair for the entire period, no air-conditioner and blowing fan, bathing with only warm water infused with herbs. The tradition is passed down with the belief that it will help reduce future health problems like rheumatism, arthritis, headaches and body pains. Being a scientific person myself, I tend to seek scientific or logic to any actions. I tend not to follow beliefs if I am not convinced. But before concluding whether or not to follow the beliefs, I first try to understand why the belief was passed down.

1) Not Bathing vs Hygiene

In olden days, there is lack of clean water and birth delivery was done in not the most hygienic environment. Bathing will introduce bacteria and the way olden days minimise infection is to keep dry. They were also able not to bathe for 30 days as the weather was cooling and not sweat. But in the context of Singapore and today's world, I think proper hygiene is important. A good balance will be to bathe in warm water. Whether to bathe in herbs or not is a personal preference.

2) "Warm" food vs a well-balanced diet

In olden days, warm food was believed to help the mother regain her qi "energy". Weather in those countries were cold and eating warm food helped the body recover and reduced chances of catching a cold. In the context of Singapore and today's world, a well-balanced diet may be more applicable. But I do believe some diet or nutrition will aid in stimulating hormones to constrict the uterus, boosting milk production, reducing constipation, building immunity, as well as hydrating the body. There may be also food that could cause bloating and colic in nursing baby.

Found a list of foods to Avoid:

1) May result in poor blood circulation and oedema in mummy and stomachache in nursing baby

    • Fruits like banana, grapefruit, watermelon, coconut

    • Vegetables like lettuce, bittergourd, cucumber, bean sprout

    • Gassy drinks, sugarcane, tofu

2) May result in excessive vaginal discharge which may 'clog' mummy's urinal system and cause diarrhoea in nursing baby

    • Acidic fruits like Pineapple, orange, lime, lemon

3) May cause bloated stomach and excessive passing of gas in mummy and colic in nursing baby

    • Onions, cooked vegetables which has been left standing for a while

4) Toxic substances in these foods are believed to slow down the healing process and cause eczema in nursing baby

    • Shelled seafood like prawns and crabs

Some Common Beliefs

Meats

Whitefish, especially thread fin - a good source of protein, which helps increase milk supply. 

Black Chicken – a very good tonic to re-build your health and energy.

Pig Stomach - helps to push out 'wind' from a new mum's stomach. 

Pig Kidney - helps to 'replenish' the kidneys, especially for mothers who suffer from pain in the lumbar region.

Pig Or Chicken Liver - has high iron content, helps to replenish blood, especially if mum is anaemic or feels weak after child birth.

Pig Trotters – provides collagen, especially good for strengthening limbs, joints and ligaments which have loosen during pregnancy.

Vegetables and Fruits

(Note: All vegetables should be cooked with sesame oil and ginger to ward off the 'cooling' properties; most fruits are forbidden during confinement as they tend to be 'cooling'.)

Kailan – rich in iron and is believed to strengthen joints and lymph, and is beneficial to veins and bones.

Lily Buds - helps to repel heat from body and soothes the liver.

Snow Pea - rich in protein and minerals.

Papaya - increases milk supply in nursing mothers.

Others

Old Ginger - helps repel 'wind'.

Rice Wine - invigorates energy and major organs in the body and dispels coldness. 

Sesame Seed / Oil - promotes blood circulation.

Wood Fungus - rich in iron, it helps stop bleeding, removes 'stale' blood and cleanses the arteries.

Eggs - nutritious food, a very good source of protein especially if you don't fancy eating meat.

Red Dates (Stoned) - replenishs blood.

Dried Longan Flesh - invigorates the body and is a good tonic for the brain. Good for mothers who feel weak and fatigue.

Black Vinegar - purifies the blood and cleanses the arteries.

Dang Gui (Chinese Angelicae) - this is dubbed the "female ginseng" – highly effective for a whole range of gynaecological complaints. A good tonic to be taken after childbirth. It's also believed to help regulate menses and relieve pain and has a tranquilising effect. It is rich in vitamins and minerals, helps to replenish and invigorate blood, and can be used for mothers who are anaemic or feel weak after delivery. It is also believed to 'moisturise' the intestines; effective in treating constipation due to dryness of the bowels.

Dan Sen (Codonopsis) - beneficial for mothers suffering from lethargy and related symptoms like fatigue and tired limbs. It acts as a powerful energy booster. In modern lab tests, it has been proven to increase red blood cell count and improve circulation.

Black Bean - need to pan-fry before using to get rid of the 'cold'; helps to replenish blood, good for mothers who have lost a lot of blood during delivery.

My sister just gave birth and her confinement lady gave her a really long list of herbs to get. We went to Eu Yan Sang, which we learn is not a good place to go as you pay a premium for the brand. All in all, I think my dad spent more than $300 on the herbs below. 

For the convenient mums, Eu Yan Sang also offer a 1 month postnatal care herb package at $268. That's how commercialized the whole confinement process has become. 

Last few weeks of pregnancy (37th week - 15 Dec)

The EDD is usually calculated based on 280 days = 40 weeks = 9 months 6 days. Statistically, the mean period to deliver is 280.6 days with a standard deviation 9.7 days. Assuming 270 days, Gabriella's date of arrival may possibly be 26 Dec.

Last few weeks... Just Waiting

1) Finding the right sleeping position is a challenge. It helps if you have a variety of pillows, both soft and hard. You will also feel warm all the time and tend to use the Fan or AC or even sleep on the floor.

2) Walking become a little more tiring and I tend to look like a penguin these days. Luckily, I do not have swollen feet (which is apparently quite common among many pregnant ladies.

3) I particularly enjoy the baby kicks. By now, your gynae would have told you to count the baby movements between 9am to 9pm. Each day, there should be at least 10. Gabriella makes really cute movements in the tummy. Sometimes it is like a wriggle, sometimes a series of hiccups, and often just plain boxing.

4) Bowel movement is not as smooth as I wish it will be. Though I am on the nipperstudy and my nutrition sample include probiotics, and I take homemade yoghurt, papaya and banana to assist in my bowels, the frequency of passing motion is at best once every 3 days. 

5) On the other hand, I experience frequent urination. My sleep is often disrupted by the urge to go toilet. And if I am out, I try not to hold my bladder so as to avoid uncontrollable leak when I sneeze.

6) Shopping and more Shopping. I have bought pretty much a long list of items, such as thermometer, swaddle, bib, co-sleeper, waterproof blanket, sebamed bath, wet wipes, bottle warmer, Coon diapers, nursing clothes, beansprout husk dream pillow, etc. 

7) We took a while to set up the baby bumper bed which we bought and carried over from Korea. Looks really cute in our room. We bought this bumper bed from a company called Geum B. It looks really sweet in our room. One common concern shared by my dad and friends is that "Isn't the bed too low? Will it be too strenuous to carry the baby in and out, up and down?" Maybe it will be, maybe it will not. I won't know till I tried it. But I do like the fact that this bumper bed will be the playpen and bed for Gabriella till she probably outgrow it. In fact, the bumper bed is so huge that my husband could snuggle inside. 

8) I have also prepared the hospital delivery bag. I was told that I just needed my identity card, hospital paperwork, a set of going home outfit for both mother and baby, toiletries (optional), marriage certificate (if you plan to register the baby's name at the hospital).